god i really hate emotions..why can't you just listen to your head and turn them off?! i know my heart is wrong, but it hurts and a subconscious part of me wants to follow it, regardless of the fact it would end up in tears (mine), again :(
i'm trying so hard to forget, and concertrate on other things to keep me busy, but then all of a sudden i remember that i can't pick up the phone and hear that everything will be ok anymore..and it's like hitting a wall, really hard when i remember..i know things will get better with time, they have to, but the selfish and irrational part of me just wants them to go back to when we were happy together..i know a lot has happened, and i can understand his reluctance, but if he gave me a chance to prove how much i have changed, and realised what i want, i'd give anything to give things another try..pathetic, i know..
as for today's outfit, i'm still on my 'heels-week', and it really does seem to be improving my confidence, i now remember when i used to wear them all the time, and how much i love to be that little bit taller! the same tape measure ones from monday, this time with a lovely blue tulip skirt i picked up last night from matalan for £6 whilst i waited for my sis to finish karate class..have teamed it with the trusty black blazer, black tights and a grey top, so that all focus is on the skirt and shoes..