Tuesday, 14 August 2012

break apart her heart..

dress: unknown brand (via ebay)
leggings: matalan // sandals (barely seen): matalan
This dress was almost thrown in the 'to get rid' pile, before being thrown on on Sunday.I purchased it from eBay, that moment when you've placed a bid on something and then decide to check out what else the seller has listed. I have no idea of the make or the size of it, and in the past I've put numerous darts in to try and make it fit me a little better. And then I've undone all my hard work by going and losing another few stone. So really it needs some sewing-machine attention or to get rid of.

But I opted for 'throw it on with a belt to cinch it in' and popped along to the BBQ we had planned at the allotments on Sunday. I have to admit, it had been one of those events I'd half-heartedly agreed to go to, and then thought I would be able to show my face, drop off my gingerbread biscuits as a contribution, and slope off fairly sharpish.

I always feel a bit uncomfortable in this group of people as the majority of the group knew each other (or so I thought anyway) before I signed up for my plot there. They all live close to each other and a lot of them seem to have grown up knowing one another, so it can be a bit tricky to feel comfortable in a social group like that.

There are a few people I've spoken to whilst I've been at the plot, everyone (with the grumpy woman excluded) is very friendly and willing to help if you need advice with anything, or to borrow a pair of scissors, for example. But despite coming across as bolshy and confident in some ways, sometimes wondering how to chip into a group dynamic like this can leave me feeling a little overwhelmed. Especially when I'm feeling under the weather because my stomach pains have reared their ugly head, and the fact that all of my muscles ache from the fence I built the previous day.

Yes, that's right, I managed to get my fence built. On Saturday. All by myself. (Except for the last little bit, where I realised I was short of wire by about 500mm. Gah. Luckily, the husband of a lovely lady I know through Guiding was at their plot and managed to help me out by finding me some more and attaching  it for me! But you wouldn't believe the smug feeling I had that evening, and then again the next day when I saw it was still standing!).

Anyway, I got down to the site and everyone seemed a bit confused about what was supposed to be going on, so being the only one on the committee I was asked for opinions and decisions, and managed to get the gazebos up with the help of some people I'd not met before. Which sort of broke the ice and didn't leave me feeling quite so socially awkward.

I spent a few hours there in the end, chatting to people I knew vaguely, and when I felt overwhelmed, tidying up the rubbish or something so I looked purposeful instead of lonely. And you know what, it wasn't as bad as I'd thought, ill-fitting dress or not. Anyone else ever find that sometimes you end up wondering why you were dreading something?

PS. I've just been told about a giveaway which E-Tail webstores are running. Enter here: a Rafflecopter giveaway


  1. I usually wonder why I didn't dread something enough, haha.

  2. Same as Sophie haha - that sounds like the worst kind of situation to be in - it's not so bad when no-one knows each other. Well done getting the fence done, you should be very proud! :)

  3. Yay glad you got the fence up, loving the pretty dress too :)

  4. Was dreading meeting a friend and her family last week. Like totally dreading it! We're not very close (but she seems to think we are) and I knew she'd want me to do more than I'm capable of, plus I was meeting her husband for the first time. She was was specially making the trip from England to see me though, which made me feel twice as bad for being such a cow about it! It turned out alright, she did press me to do more than I could manage but I just stayed for a couple of hours and explained that I couldn't with my illness and she took it alright.

    Lovely dress btw!