Monday, 29 July 2013

that's just me, before we met..

This past week or so has been quite odd. A bit melancholy; I've spent too much time thinking about things I miss, as I've finally cut the last ties I had with someone who was doing everything they could to hurt me. I know I should feel free, but so far I sort of just miss how things used to be and I guess I've been feeling a little lonely as well when I think of the time I used to spend with this person.

I live relatively far from the majority of my closest friends, which makes me sad sometimes. I do see them all as much as possible, but when someone lives 90mins drive away it's a little more tricky to arrange to visit than just popping round for a coffee and a chat after work.

I've been distracting myself from these thoughts a little bit. I've got plenty to fill my time with after all with the allotment, the gym, and there's always someone to chat to on twitter or a blog post to read to distract myself. I sort of feel as though all of these things are separate and that I juggle all of them. Very few of my real-life friends know me on twitter, and not many of them read / know about my blog and I've always tried to keep them separate. I'm not sure why. The other night I was pretty freaked out by the thought of a friend finding my twitter ID and therefore my blog. Like really upset by the thought. But when Sarah asked me what I was scared of, I couldn't think of a decent answer. Are my friends likely to disown me because I write a blog? Because I write a blog which they didn't know about? I'd hope not.

But then I read Jennie's post and it got me thinking. What does it matter? My blog is a little part of the many things which make up who I am. I share a lot of things on there, in the same way that lots of people share things on other forms of social media, I'm sure. I shouldn't be embarrassed about it, should I? I'm not one of those people who has little business cards made up with the details of it, but everything I post is out there, on the internet, for the world to see and it's not as though I say anything on here which I wouldn't say elsewhere. I suppose it's just that in my everyday life, people would probably just get bored of how much I have to say about shoes. And clothes. And shoes again.

Do you share everything with everyone? Or are there certain parts of your life you don't talk about? I know there are things I don't mention on my blog because they just aren't relevant to it, and whatever happens I still won't talk about the subjects I feel are off-limits. But I'm not ashamed of my blog, so why hide it? If anything, I should be proud of it - I know it's nothing much in the "blogging world" but I have made some lovely friends through it and had some wonderful experiences which I'd not have imagined before.

dress + cardigan: primark
shoes: office


  1. I used to be quite a private person...I share a lot now, I guess I've had to for certain things and that's carried over. Perhaps I share too much but that's life!

    Love those shoes x

  2. Love this post Char. I'm the same, I have my 'real life friends' and my 'special internet friends' - no-one from RL knows about my blog (I don't think!) but gradually the divide is closing. My best friends now follow me on Instagram, which has the same name as my Twitter, which has a link to my blog so I shouldn't be hard to find. Bu I don't know why I'm bothered because most of the stuff I put on there (sewing, crochet) is plastered all over my Facebook anyway!

    I'm also the same as you in that most of my real-life and internet friends are far away so any social engagement takes weeks of planning and it can all be pretty exhausting (not to mention expensive).

    Also, I love your dress! I have the same one but it was too small for me to wear this summer - horror of horrors! Gym time! x

  3. I share a lot more on my twitter and my blog then I ever do on my facebook. My facebook is a very narrow and heavily modified version of my life whereas the other two are my real versions of me, if that makes sense. I'm not really sure why that's the case though just how it's happened. Saying that I don't feel the need to share everything, especially about my marriage.

  4. You definitely shouldn't be embarrassed of your blog, in fact I think you should be very proud because you've created something so wonderful and stuck with it.

    Sometimes I constantly battle with myself with where that line of over-sharing is, I'm still not exactly sure but I do know that it's nice to keep some things back, just for yourself.

    I'm not really one for facebook, but I like to have a little look every so often at what people are up to and I'm always a little amazed by those who literally share every thing. I think it takes away from that little bit of mystery about a person. It's wonderful to get to know someone, but a little overwhelming if you instantly find out every single little thing about them.

    Lovely post, it's really got me thinking & thank you for linking mine!

    Jennie xo |

  5. I do tell friends about my blog but not work colleagues, unless we're also friends. My family know about it and read it but never comment, which to me is like spying on me! I'm not on Facebook because I hate it and I guess my Twitter is more personal than my blog, though linked.

  6. Such an interesting post Char, I always struggle in terms of what to share, both with "real life" people and on my blog. Only a couple of my "real" friends read my blog, and I know I shouldn't feel embarrassed by it (and I'm pretty sure that anybody who knows me also knows I am a massive cake fiend) but somehow linking it into my facebook or telling everybody I know terrifies me. I think I'd feel too watched/ stalked (coincidently why I don't share that much on my facebook!) and would end up too inhibited to post. It's difficult when I'm naturally a private person.

    I also struggle with wanting my blog to have a sense of identity and continuity, but at the same time it only represents a fraction of my personality. I'm never very sure whether to show my interest in clothes, sewing, art, my sarcasm and that I love watching Adam Buxton and Regular Ordinary Swedish Meal Time on youtube!

    Sorry for the long comment. Hope you have a better week this week :)

  7. I've not told any one about my blog (apart from a couple of friends who I originally met through concert-going), and I worry about people finding me in the online world. I'm not sure what I'm afraid of exactly. I guess maybe that my family and friends will think it's weird and judge me, and I'd be a little embarrassed if they read my personal musings.

    You shouldn't be worried or ashamed of your blog, though; you should be proud of what you've created!

  8. I share most things on my blog, unless I think it would embarrass anyone. Everyone I know, knows about my blog, and lots read it on a regular basis.

    Please dont feel worried about your Friends reading your blog, you should be proud of it! x

  9. Love your style, so cute!
    I don't share too much on my blog simply because I don't have much to write but you shouldn't worry about people reading it. Most people will think it's interesting :)
    Your blog is great too, going back to check out past posts now!


    Blog: Stolen Inspiration
    Instagram: KendraAlexandra
    Facebook: StolenInspiration

  10. Love this post, I'm exactly the same. The majority of my real life friends live far away now and their interests and mine are completely different. I can't talk shoes, clothes and makeup with anyone like I can on my blog. My real life friends don't know I blog or else don't read it, I'm very secretive about it with them for some reason. A friend once asked why I didn't post new blog posts on Facebook and that I should 'self promote' but I didn't tell her it's because I didn't want her or anyone I 'know' reading it! I would utterly panic if anyone I knew in real life was reading my blog and DID panic when I stupidly changed my blog-FB account and they forced me to use my real name, because I didn't want anyone in real life finding me!!

    Although my immediate family know I blog, I keep my blog private from them and actually go out of my way to hide what I'm working on when they pass me working away at the computer! I just feel they they wouldn't get why I'm posting outfit shots or shoes or pictures of myself, I think they think I would be over-sharing or am up-myself! That's why I only take photos myself, I would feel stupid asking someone else to do it for me. I can imagine my parents would fear for weird internet stalkers or something, if they knew I posted photos of myself every day and that people know what I look like! I do internally panic that someone (from real life) one day will find me in a google search, I mean if you search anything Irregular Choice it will come up with photos of my feet and once my Mum was searching for something Dorothy Perkins and found a photo of me, which I quickly dismissed. They just have no idea what my blog involves and I kinda like keeping it like that.

  11. I can totally understand your anxieties! I wish, oh how I wish I could go back into the past and think when I created my blog URL, because er- you can just find me and know who I am. I am always worried about school parents finding it and reading it. Or kids. Various family members read my blog and they've always been nice about it (most discovered me by googling me except my older sister who is the only person I have ever given my URL voluntarily) and CBC's family do too (also discovered by googling!!!) plus I keep finding out people I used to go to school with or work with still read my blog periodically and they just discovered it themselves. I think I am mostly embarassed about my clothing shots but I just because I don't want to come across as vain or self-obsessed.

    Anyway, I love your blog and what you write and I never think you share too much. Plus you have such a wonderful collection of dresses, that it is always a pleasure to see them!xx

  12. I would say the majority of people I know in 'real life' know about my blog as it tends to be something that comes up in conversation eventually and the job I do I got because of my blog. I am wary of oversharing but I have [posted about the lows as well as the highs on ym blog, for me it is something that encapsulates the past 3 and a half years perfectly!

    Maria xxx